Perception.
Yeah.
Perception is totally biased because no one can see your life through anything but their eyes.
They can only view your world from their own experience and place in life. And depending on their age, that perception will be totally screwed up.
Take, for instance: work.
People put their own expectations on you based on their work experience. Sometimes that is a limited point of view – other times, decades of experience come into play.
Either way, their vision is not your own and the old adage about don't judge someone until you've walked a mile in their shoe is completely true.
It is all about where we've been.
The best way to simplify this idea is to look at children and how they perceive what we say to them.
They are young with no frame of reference. They are little talkers in training.
I have a grandson who tells me we need new glitter for the cat potty box.
One of my sons when he was small, got up to the table for dinner, handed his butter knife to me and said, "Take my dinner weapon."
We had strawbabies for strawberries; mow-mow way for lawnmower; ku-ku-zium for jacuzzi; and bugs were called "go-aways" because my son would see us waving our hand in front of our face and say "go-away bug".
It would be easy for someone unfamiliar with small children to be critical of these errors. They might think the child is not bright or hard of hearing because they are not repeating the words correctly.
Neither are true. Children, like adults, learn at their own pace with repetition and usage being the best teacher.
Frame of reference; a greater understanding of what is expected of them is important.
Being impatient and not recognizing their efforts might set them back; not working with them to show them the correct way would certainly slow down their progress.
Let's go one step further and think about what the lack of communication does to us as humans.
What happens if you are trying to explain something to someone and they just don't get it. Over and over, you try to find different ways to explain your side, but they aren't listening or they cannot comprehend?
What happens if your cell phone goes out in the middle of a conversation and your communication is cut off?
Frustration. Aggravation. Sometimes even anger.
It is that perception that we are not being heard or understood that stalls learning, prevents sharing.
So be patient when you are dealing with someone who is new at what they are doing.
They'll get it in their own time.
This article originally appeared on Santa Rosa Press Gazette: Woman on the Edge: Perception, yeah